Couch-tober Fest is once again upon us. For 31 days only we are offering cash for your sectionals, love seats, sofas, and ottomans. Sorry, futons need not apply.
Give me your tired springs and outdated velour,
Your soiled cushions yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your Ikea store.
Send these, the couches, tempest-tost to me,
I will deliver cash at your door.*
So what are you waiting for? Come on down to Huggie's Discount Furniture Store; The Ellis Island of home decorating!
* No refunds given for valuables found between the cushions.